For me, the Christmas tradition of gift giving has become frustrating for several reasons. Don't get me wrong, I love to give gifts!
When I am trying to decide what to buy or make for someone, I usually think 'practical'.
What do they need? In fact we even ask people to make a list of things they need? I think it's a great idea to ask & get them what they need for obvious reasons! 1. It's economical! I'm all about that. I don't like to 'waste' money or time. 2. It saves them from the job/chore of going to the store to buy the item. 3. It fulfills my 'duty' of buying them a gift, and it saves me from walking around the store for hours, wondering what they would like! 4. It's something they will use and not something that gets thrown away or taken to the Crowded Closet/Goodwill Store, or heaven-forbid RE-GIFTED!
When I give a gift, I like the receiver to be delighted with it! I want it to be meaningful, but also useful. I don't generally like to give things that just sit around to look at, unless it holds a message or meaning. I think that's because I don't like to receive gifts like that. (primarily because it's not very practical) I call those "fluffy" gifts. Oh, I used to like things like that, but as I've gotten older, my house is full of that kind of thing and I'm looking to clear some of the 'fluff'! So now I've become much more critical of the gifts I receive. (shame on me, more on this later)
Recently I did a quiz to learn more about myself and here are two questions that got my attention.
- "I like to give things away but I am almost embarrassed to receive gifts from people."
- "I give things to people not just because they need them but rather to honor people who deserve it."
True or False?
Here are my answers:
1. True.... I must confess, it is pride. Why else could one give gifts but have a hard time receiving? poor self esteem? still pride...... not worthy? I think the root is still pride.
2. False..... I usually only give them things they need! If I don't know what they "NEED" I often give consumable products.... candy, food, lotion ect...
Think about this with me..... Kings give Kings gifts they don't need. Look at the examples in the Bible. King Solomon was the wealthiest King in the land. He didn't need a thing and yet all the kings and Queen's around, brought gifts to him. Gifts like gold, rare spices, precious stones, musical instruments and special wood. (II Chronicles 9) King Solomon also gave gifts back to them (vs12), even more than she had brought to him! Why???
Think of this...If you and I are Kings and I see a need in your palace, so I buy you the thing you need and give it to you. I have just showed you that I saw a need you had and I filled that need so that makes me greater than you! That's why Kings give gifts of things they don't need!
Why would you give someone a Rolex when a Timex looks very similar and is just as useful? The Rolex has no more ability to keep time than a Timex.
Why spend $20,000 when you could buy the more practical timepiece for $30?
Because you value the person, and it shows honor to them. You value their input into your life. Because you love what the person has contributed to you, your business, your family.
We see this example in John 12:1-11 Mary anointed Jesus with a very expensive bottle of perfume. This was done to show how much value she placed on Him. This incident happened soon after her brother Lazarus was raised from the dead, do you think it was 'thank you gift'.
Maybe this is the meaning of Acts 20:35 "It is more blessed to give than receive."
More than the actual, physical gift is the gift of honor & personal value behind the gift.
I am not advocating that you go overspend your budget to buy this kind of extravagant gifts. But let's not miss the principal either. What value do you place on the recipients of your gifts? Ask yourself, What is my motivation for giving this gift? is it to improve your image? to improve your selfworth/self esteem. We can give ourselves poor if this is our motive. It is useless. "God loves a cheerful giver." I believe this means the giver has his focus is on the recipient, not on himself.
This also deepens my understanding in how to receive a gift. My husband is an extravagant giver. Several years ago he gave me a Rolex for Christmas. At the time, it felt frivolous and unnecessary, maybe even a waste. When I consider the giver...and what he is 'telling' me with this gift, the value he places on me and the honor they are displaying... it comes as a very deep and rich gift no matter what the item is. I can't believe I've missed it all these years!
The gifts I receive this year will mean something deeper than ever before.
